Going to therapy was one of the best decisions I’ve made in my life. After running through my life like Roadrunner, it felt good to just stop. While there are a lot of people who arch their brows at the idea of telling their problems to a stranger, I honestly believe it saved my life.
Have you ever tried to drive a car with a flat tire, no gas, or a busted radiator? It’s terrible and I would never recommend it. And that’s how I felt. I had just lost about 70 lbs hitting the gym every day, working full time, and making plans to set up alternative financial funnels that could help my future. I was pushing the pedal to the metal and I wasn’t even looking at my “Check Engine” light.
Under the hood, I had a lot of unresolved issues that I’d just ignored up to that point. And in that first session, I realized it. I cried. And not the pretty, minimal tears either. She explained that I had a moderate case of mild depression. And that I had two choices in dealing with it. I could handle it medicinally or through more sessions of therapy. Since medicine has never been my preference, I chose therapy sessions.
Six months later and I’m still learning that every day I unlearn toxic behavior and take one step forward is a win. Facing my mindset and my depression hasn’t been easy. It’s pretty difficult on most days. It’s choosing to get out of bed or explaining to people I love that I can’t be a soundboard for them all the time. It’s taking each moment one at a time and being gentle with myself. And it’s learning to forgive people who may not understand what I’m going through.
This has been my journey. If you’ve ever experienced any level of depression, then your experience may be different. But know that you’re not alone in your journey. Do what you have to do to protect your peace of mind and your sanity. This may mean ending certain relationships, taking time out for yourself, meditating, working out, self-care, finding a licensed therapist or psychiatrist, finding a healthy community or small group to confide in.
If you’re looking for a sign that things will and can get better, then consider this the Krispy Kreme Neon Sign of Signs.
D'Miria Collins 